21 of The Best Cricket Sledges of All Time 2

21 of The Best Cricket Sledges of All Time

Cricket is one of the sports where it is actually pretty normal to have a go at the opposition. Sledging a batsman is seen as pretty normal. If you’re going to step up to the crease on a weekend, expect a little bit of chirping in your ear from the opposition. It can feel lonely out there, you can feel like it’s you against the world when batting.

Fortunately, most of it is in good humour, and there are some very funny cricket sledges that you can use to try and get in the batsman’s head. You’ll see from some of the best examples that it can be a great way to get a psychological advantage. When a batsman is struggling, there’s nothing they hate more than hearing chirping in their ear while at the crease.

In this post, we’re going through some great cricket sledges you can use, as well as famous examples from cricket history.

“Mind the windows”

This is one of the most famous examples of sledging. When Freddie Flintoff chirped this at Tino Best after going for a big swing, Best threw his wicket away incredibly quickly. This is one of the sledges that can be replicated in village cricket, perfect for when someone tries to overdo it!

The look on Freddie Flintoff’s face is a great memory for English cricket fans.

“Would you like me to bowl a piano and see if you can play that”

You can always change the instrument in your sledging, but this is the famous example from Merv Hughes, bowling to Graham Gooch. Gooch had an uncharacteristic spell of not being able to see the ball, leading to Hughes to chirp one of the all-time classics.

Warne vs Cullinan

Shane Warne was bowling to South African Daryll Cullinan: “I’ve been waiting two years for another chance at you.”

Cullinan replied with a simple comeback “Looks like you spent it eating.”

That’s one way to deal with sledging.

Siddons vs Waugh

This one happened in a Sheffield Shield match. Steve Waugh was taking his time and marking his guard a lot, to which Siddons said: “it’s not a f****** test match”. Waugh’s reply? “of course it isn’t, you’re here”.

“It’s red, it’s round, you hit it”

A classic sledge. When the batsman is struggling for form, you can remind them what the ball looks like. Beware though, Viv Richards showed the ultimate comeback, he smashed the next delivery for six and gloriously responded: “you know what it looks like, now go and get it.”

“Don’t bother son, you won’t be out there long enough.”

England great Fred Trueman was fielding near the gate from the pavilion. When the new batter came out, he turned around to shut the gate to be met by a classic from Trueman.

“Don’t bother son, you won’t be out there long enough.”

Mark Waugh vs James Ormond

James Ormond came to the crease when playing for England against Australia. Mark Waugh was fielding slip and said: “You’re too s*** to play for England!”

Ormond had a glorious response: “Maybe so, but at least I’m the best player in my family”. Ouch!

21 of The Best Cricket Sledges of All Time 3

“Which one of you b*******”

In the infamous Bodyline series, England captain Douglas Jardine went to the opposing dressing room to explain to the Aussie captain Bill Woodfull that one of their players had called him a “b******”.

Woodfull is said to have turned around to his teammates and asked: “Which one of you b******* called this b******* a b*******?”

This might not technically be sledging, but it shows that there has been a sense of humour in cricket for decades.

Some Classic Funny Cricket Sledges for You to Use

Some of the most famous cricket sledges come from pure wit. You’ll want your wittiest fielders at slip if you’re going to try and get in the batsman’s head.

  • “Take the keys off him he can’t drive” – Pretty self-explanatory this one. Perfect if a batsman’s drives aren’t connecting.
  • “All swing, no ding” – Perfect for the batsman who is trying the big hits but not pulling it off.
  • “Swinging like a rusty gate”
  • “Didn’t know Gray Nics made fishing poles” – Great for when the batsman just can’t make contact.
  • “More leaves than a tree” – Time to encourage the batsman to play some more big hits?
  • “More blocks than a lego set” – Another designed to get the batsman taking you on.
  • “If you turn the bat over you’ll find the instructions” – This is a classic from Merv Hughes, bowling to Robin Smith. It’s great for using yourself while fielding.
  • “Couldn’t catch a cold” – Yes, you can sledge the wicket-keeper or the fielders, too!
  • “Put your seat belts on, this guy can’t drive”

And some more contributed from our amazing village cricket community.

  • “More chop than a Jackie chan movie!”
  • “He likes knicking things let’s take him to the jewellers.”
  • “This batsman has more edge than U2.”
  • “More swing than the sixties.”
  • “Tarzan is swinging so much, someone get him Jane.”

Let’s face it, there are some classics you can throw out there any time, but the best sledges are the spontaneous “mind the windows” style ones. If you’re new to cricket, it might not seem like a very gentlemanly way to behave, but sledging has been part of the game for as long as anyone can remember. It’s a psychological sport.

Do you have any classic cricket sledges to share? Have we missed any of the famous cricket sledges from history? If you know of any brilliant moments of wit from your teammates, leave a comment.

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